i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
