Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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