and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
