your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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