I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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