This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
