How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
