I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
