escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
