she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
