We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
third nipple confirmed
Randomize
