Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
