addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize