fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
the liver wants what the liver wants
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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