operation harelip BJ is a go
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
