In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize