We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
