have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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