She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
