Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
