Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
