so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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