Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Randomize
