do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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