Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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