We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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