You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
