Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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