the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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