MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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