Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
