I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
