That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
