guys are not supposed to queef...right?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
