Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize