i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
