A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
It's rum buckets o'clock
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
