This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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