It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
