i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
