I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
