Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
You smell like stripper and shame
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
