Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
