This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
