i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Vodka?
Forever.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
