I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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