Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i out mim tonsoeep
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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