At least make sure they are 18
Why
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
