Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
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