Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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